We aren’t dumb…but we are susceptible. Which is why we were drawn in by the press release touting Bicycling Magazine’s latest readers’ poll, which leads with the finding that 58 percent of the publication’s female readers would give up sex for a month rather than spend a similar time off their bikes.

Ostensibly, this kind of question is included in a survey to gauge one’s passion for the sport; in reality, it’s there because virtually any answer is your press release lead. It generates coverage. Like this.

We have no idea how to interpret this finding. At first blush, it seems like a battle of daily endorphins versus less frequent orgasms (we’re assuming). Then we ask: Do Bicycling Magazine’s female readers find biking that great? Is their sex that sad? Is the quality of their sex reflected in the finding that the mag’s male readers were split 50-50 on which activity they’d be willing to give up, which means half the men would favor their bikes over their wives and girlfriends. Almost as many of the men (46 percent) thought a male cyclist’s legs should be shaved. So. No one here is drawing any conclusions from that, or anything, really, but. So.

As fascinating as this is, we would like additional detail on the survey results. Specifically, how did the olds respond? Where are seniors on the pressing question of sex versus cycle? How many old guys really want to shave their legs? You have our attention, Bicycling Magazine. Now inform us.

Photo of tandem bike for four (1898), by George H. Van Norman, Springfield, Mass., from the collection of the Library of Congress via Wikimedia Commons.